Why The ‘Fast’ Franchise Deserves Your Time, Money And Respect (No Really)


Oh, we’re about to get real…

This past weekend the SIXTH entry in the Fast & Furious franchise broke allllll kinds of records. The SIXTH entry earned $117 million in it’s opening weekend, topping Fast Five‘s opening, making it the biggest opening for the franchise yet. In case you missed it: this is the SIXTH entry in the franchise. The SIXTH entry in the franchise earned a franchise BEST for it’s opening weekend. It should outgross Fast Five and has an outside shot at earning a billion worldwide (I just decided this). Um…when does this happen for a third entry in a franchise, let alone THE SIXTH ENTRY? This is INSANE and I respect the hell out of this. *hand claps emoji*

Leading up to the release of Fast 6, I told everyone I could how excited I was for this. Outside of those who understand the way the world works, or should, most people met this declaration with a raised eyebrow, naturally. That’s fine. I get it. These movies are dumb and ridiculous…but why is that NOT okay? Why does that mean we shouldn’t take these movies seriously? Because they star Vin Diesel? Oh, please f-ck off. Again: I know how dumb these movies are. But these movies also know how dumb these movies are. Fast 6 is the most fun I’ve had in the theaters since The Avengers (and this might have been MORE enjoyable on a totally different level).  And: the last two entries in the franchise have earned good reviews from critics. Does that help?

What I admire most about the Fast franchise is that, essentially, it’s reinvented itself 3 times over. In last week’s issue of Entertainment Weekly, their cover story on the franchise notes that the third film, Tokyo Drift was almost a straight-to-DVD release and Universal was hoping for the series to playout like the American Pie franchise. That would’ve made sense and would’ve done well too but I’m so glad they did not. Then came The Fast & The Furious, the fourth film in the series which was essentially the reboot. It’s an okay movie but was made to set everything in place for what was to follow…kind of like Iron Man 2. Then came Fast Five, the first Fast movie to really make a dent and helped get the attention of those who couldn’t look away from the franchise any longer.

As I noted earlier, Fast Six is a lot of fun. Fast Six is f-cking insane and so, so, so ridiculous (spoiler: can we talk about the scene where Dom FLIES IN THE AIR to save you-know-who? BECAUSE OH MY GOD IT WAS AMAZING) but again, so, so much fun. And that’s all I want from these movies. All I want is to be entertained for 2 hours. And Fast Six, a movie where the best actor is Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, is the most fun I’ve had at the theatre all year. Suck on that.

Also: Vin Diesel is Iron Man, The Rock is The Hulk, Paul Walker/Captain America, Michelle Rodriquez/Black Widow, Tyrese/Thor & Ludacris is Hawkeye. Right?



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