“I Tried My Best Not To Yell” Also Known As My Recap Of The 2013 Emmy Awards

I’m running on 5 hours of sleep (guys, Prisoners scared me) and am a bundle of nerves so there are going to be grammar issues and spelling mistakes a plenty and if you love me, then this too shall pass…

Last night the Emmy awards happened. Apparently a lot of you watched this year. This has less to do with anything that happened last night and more to do with the fact that we are consuming television more than ever before. Seriously. I helped a customer at work today who bought seasons 1 & 2 of Game of Thrones, the ORIGINAL House Of Cards (because she enjoyed the Netflix one so much) and, because of my recommendation, bought season one of Homeland. Just because I told her she would love it. She doesn’t know me, yet she trusted me (it’s because of my gentle eyes). But the point is that TV is continuing to have it’s moment right now. At the same time, the Emmys continue to fuck with my hopes & dreams for it’s nominees. Let’s get to it:

The host: Neil Patrick Harris is better than whatever was handed to him last night. Nothing he said was memorable and his terrible opening was ultimately saved by those who joined him (Tina, Amy & Fallon almost killed me). But really NPH is so much better than last night. See his opening from the 2013 Tony Awards:

See? FUNNY! And fun! That clip-reel opening was neither of those things. Ultimately though, Kevin Spacey gave us the greatest thing ever last night (I needed season 2 of House of Cards, like, yesterday)

Tina & Amy: Tina Fey & Amy Poehler: Saving Awards Shows Since 2007 is what their business cards should say. God bless these two. I love them so.

The winners: The night should have ended after Merritt Weaver’s speech because no one – NO ONE – could top that. More than 5 people now know the name Merritt Weaver. Her win is the kind of win I love; a complete surprise but not one person could be mad over it and when you deliver a speech that good? Even better.

I love Veep a lot so Julia Louis-Dreyfus’ acceptance speech ft. Tony Hale was perfection. For those who have never seen Veep it didn’t work, but that was a brilliant moment for the fans. Did I want Amy Poehler to win? Yes, desperately – but with a speech like that (and JLD deserved the award just as much), I’m more than fine with it. At the same time, Tony Hale’s win was so, so well deserved. Also love that Tina won for writing.

The losers: I only watched the first hour of the show so when I got home last night I had to check out the list of winners. It was genuinely disheartening to see that Kerry Washington lost last night. I say this with my fandom aside. Claire Daines is good on Homeland but I don’t really think she deserved a win for last season. My problem with her winning is that the unwillingness of the voters to unhinge from what is safe is so clear. Not that Kerry winning was risky in anyway, but not only would it have been historic, it would have helped everyone involved & more importantly, it was more than deserved. Imagine how great that speech would have been? Imagine how much more attention the show would have gotten? Imagine how much play her acceptance speech would have gotten from media outlets? It would have been one of the top stories. WHO is talking about Claire Danes’ win? No one, because no1curr. It’s the lack of imagination to think outside of the box and the failure to capitalize on the moment that is so frustrating. And don’t come at me with Don Cheadle’s win from last year because that was more undeserved than outside of the box which is just as frustrating. But enough about that.

Remember when they gave Jeff Daniels the Emmy last night? Oh okay. Look, I don’t like Breaking Bad & I don’t care to change that opinion (you can yell at me in the comment section below, e-mail me or tweet me @TheReelTimes) but even I know that Bryan Cranston probably should have won that (my heart needs and wants Jon Hamm to win though, GOD DAMNIT!).

Modern Family finally got shut out last night. Well, sort of. This is now the fourth year in a row it’s won for Best Comedy. After last season I will no longer be a regular viewer of Modern Family, so yes, totally deserved. The show winning this award for the fourth year in a row is a wonderful example of how when the Emmys actually do capitalize on the moment like they did when Modern Family won for it’s first year (which was more than deserved) they then drag it out and keep awarding them long after their moment has passed. Which leads me to Jim Parsons’ win which I can only describe my feelings toward with this gif:

I will end this post rant with Michael Douglas’ amazing acceptance speech:

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